Voodoo dolls, human sacrifices, and mysterious leaders—all these come to mind when we hear the word “cult.” However, these things were not a part of the cult my family and I followed in our hometown before we came to know the truth.

Sure, we had strange activities. We met and lived in the boondocks and there were unexplainable things that we said and did. We performed rituals and had activities that often involved our leader appearing to be possessed by a spirit or a dead person, usually a saint or a well known personality. We went by different names. But it wasn’t as awful or as exaggerated as the movies or novels portray.

We did not wear ridiculous outfits. We did not offer animals or human sacrifices to our “gods.” We did not have any gods other than the Catholic saints and the Trinity. We did believe our place would be the new heaven and earth. We did believe that we were the chosen ones, and our leader was God’s messenger. We did believe we were on our way to heaven.

My family joined the cult as a result of an experience my grandmother had. She used to have serious asthma attacks. When the doctors and medicines failed to give her relief or cure her asthma, she tried alternative means. Someone referred her to a well known faith healer who resided in a secluded area of our town. She attended one of the sessions and got healed. As a result, our whole clan became a major supporter and member of the faith healer’s group. A legitimate reason, don’t you think? I did not understand then that the healing didn’t justify the cult.

I was only four years old when we started attending the ceremonies. For one whole year we even lived in the community where our leader was based. At a young age, I was always in a state of confusion. As a child, I always wondered why not all of my classmates, relatives or friends did the things my cult did. I knew, even then, that something was not right.

You might be surprised that not everything in our cult life was horrible. There were funny, interesting, and precious moments that I still hold dear in my heart. There are some lessons I’ve learned and facts of life I’ve come to appreciate because of our experiences. For one thing, I have first hand knowledge of how and why faith healers are so much in demand and trusted in the far-flung places in spite of breakthroughs in medicine and technology. I understand how families influence and affect the lives and destinies of family members. I know how to adapt in a really strange and sometimes unheal-thy environments and situations. I know why people get hooked on cults and other groups.

Finally, I realize how blessed we are to know the truth, and to be set free.

By the way, want to know the reason we left the group? We discovered their secret…

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Suwerte or good fortune is a powerful word in the Philippines. Remember the commercial, “Ang wallet na masuwerte”? A friend described luck to me this way, “life is like a wheel, ‘gulong ng palad’, sometimes it’s your turn to have good luck. So when good luck comes, take advantage of it!” According to these standards, you are lucky if you have a lot of money. You are lucky when you get a promotion. You know the boss, so you have connections, you’re lucky. You have a dream that something good happens, so you believe, good luck is coming. I know of a restaurant that stays in the same place because they believe if they move, their luck may change. My wife’s friend got a gift of a “lucky bean plant.” The plant died. She asked, “Why did it die, and what should I do?” She thought having the plant made her lucky. Lotto is so popular because, “It could be your lucky day!”

What do you believe about suwerte? Does the Bible say anything about suwerte? Is suwerte a part of God’s plan for your life?

We’ve been brought up to believe in luck. A writer said it this way, “Since we feel that life is out of our control, we need suwerte; we have to depend on luck.” Our turn will come, our ship will arrive.

Is suwerte in the Bible? It’s not there! The Bible does not mention the word luck, not even one time! Is the idea of a wheel of fortune something that is found in the Bible? It’s not there! The word “fortune” is only found 5 times in the Bible. Once it relates to fortune telling. The other times, it is only used negatively, showing that God is against the idea of fortune.

The Bible does not tell us that a good life is about having good luck. Believing in luck, in suwerte is deceptive. The effect of suwerte is that people think, “I cannot make a difference, so I am not responsible.” The Bible does not say anything about luck, but the Bible does say we are responsible for our life and our choices.

What does God say about his plan for your life? Jeremiah 29:11-12 says “I know the plans I have for you, says the Lord, plans to prosper you and not harm you, to give you a future and a hope.” Some people think that with luck they will have a future. The Bible says, God already has a plan that includes our future! God is our God whether we are rich or poor in this world’s goods. God is our God whether we are walking in troubled times, whether we have enemies or not. God will fulfill His purpose for us! God’s promises are not based on luck, or on whether or not we are having a good day. God’s promises are based on his own character…God always keeps his word.

Your life depends on your choices—not on luck. Choose to follow God’s plan for your eternal life. Choose to follow God’s word for living out your days. Choose to take responsibility for your life, your family, your marriage, your future, your education.

Thomas Jefferson, third president of the United States said, “I’m a great believer in luck and I find the harder I work, the more I have of it.”

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by Nelson Dy

Ate Evelyn Feliciano

“Wala kang utang na loob!” “Di ka marunong makisama!” “Ako ang masusunod!”

How many times have we heard these words? More importantly, can we harness these seemingly negative traits into something positive? To learn how to apply them in our families, I consulted Ms. Evelyn Miranda-Feliciano. The wife of Professor David Feliciano and the mother of two full-grown sons, she has written several best-selling books, among them Love and Courtship, Love, Sex and Marriage and Filipino Values and our Christian Faith. I was eager to hear how she would answer my questions concerning cultural values and families.

The Felicianos greeted us warmly and I found myself admiring their home, nestled in Adlas, a breezy barangay in Silang, Cavite. There were rows of bookshelves in the sala, a special room where they do nothing but study and write, a modest garden and farm, even a playful dog for a pet. In this relaxed setting, Ate Evelyn generously shared her insights on Filipino values and how they can be used as building blocks for raising excellent families.

How do you view Filipino values in general?
I have found that many elements of our values are much closer to Biblical teachings than we imagine. For instance, Filipinos value relationships and people more than material goods or individual happiness as generally valued in the West.

Let’s examine some specific values. Take pakikisama, for example. How would you define it?
Pakikisama means the ability to get along well with others. It is treating the other person as your equal. I am willing to submit my wishes to yours for the sake of the overall good. Even if I don’t like the plan, I will go along with it because it is what the majority decided on.

Mr. and Mrs. David Feliciano

Suppose a teenager joins a barkada which wants to do something wrong. The teenager resists, and the friends taunt him with “Wala kang pakikisama!” What should the parent say to the teenager?
I would say, “You know, pakikisama is good, if what you do is good. But if what you want to do is bad, then pakikisama is bad for you.” Be clear in telling the teenager that what his friends are pressuring him to do is wrong. I believe a better strategy is to let the teenager think for himself. Discuss the options with them. What are the potential outcomes of their behavior? Tell them, “It’s your decision. But be sure you are ready to face the consequences of your actions.” If the teen, due to lack of experience, still does not understand what could happen to him, the parent can point it out to him.

But what if your teenager insists on doing the wrong thing?
In that case, assert your authority and say no. However, ask for cooperation, especially with teenagers. Teenagers seek their own identity and too much parental pressure makes them rebellious. So whether you give the child leeway, or you put your foot down depends on the circumstances and the relationship you have with your teenager. I admit it’s a delicate balance. That is why parents need to be trained in effective parenting. More than that, parents need sensitivity and wisdom from the Lord.

What about utang na loob? Is it good or bad?
Well, that depends upon how it is used. It is bad if it is viewed as a debt of gratitude that can never be paid. In that case, you are at the mercy of the other person. Sometimes parents use utang na loob to put children in bondage for life. I have heard parents telling their kids, “Wala kang utang na loob! I gave you life, I fed you, I educated you. This is how you treat us in return?” The children then grow up bitter towards their parents instead of feeling love for them.

However, utang na loob is good in the sense that we admit that we could not be the person we are, were it not for other people helping us. So, we feel gratitude. In fact, the Bible teaches us to be thankful to God, and help others. Gratitude is not imposed on them, but it is an expression of gratitude. Utang na loob can be a good value.

Do children really owe their parents? When is the debt repaid?
When parents think their children owe them, they don’t understand what parenting is all about. They are missing the point. Children are supposed to be blessings; parenting is a privilege and responsibility. Parents should not be naghihingi ng sukli or naniningil. When children do good things for their parents in gratitude, it should come naturally.

Ate Evelyn at her garden

Let’s shift to the role of the parents. How would you understand the husband as the head of the family?
Traditionally, the husband is supposed to be the authority and to be followed in all things. But in reality, he shares some tasks with the wife. For example, a Filipino husband usually lets his wife handle the money if she is better at it. But in other cases, the roles may be switched.

We keep hearing of a Bible verse that says, “Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord.” But if we check it out, we will find out that this follows another verse that says, “Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.” If we go back to the Creation story, we read that God gave both man and woman dominion over the earth. Therefore, marriage has to involve mutual submission and leadership between husband and wife. They should consult each other and make decisions together.

How do you and David make decisions together?
One major example is in how we use money. We talk it over and decide together how much goes for this and that. If we do not agree, we pray together until we have consensus. Sometimes he makes the decisions in areas where he knows better than I do, and vice versa.

That works if the wife has a wise and kind husband. But how can a wife protect herself if the husband is abusive?
The best protection is to educate the wife. I have a new book, Iba’t Ibang Pahirap, Punit-punit na Pangarap, which explains this in depth. Basically, the wife has to know how she should be treated as a wife. She is to be cherished, protected and loved by her husband. If the husband abuses her, whether verbally, financially or physically, then he is not treating his wife as she ought to be treated.

What practical steps should an abused wife take?
First, an abused wife should tell somebody such as a friend, counselor or pastor. Then she needs to defend herself in whatever way she can. If the husband normally comes home drunk and beats her, the wife must run and hide. If the husband catches her, she can use something to block his blows. The point is that there is a cycle of violence which needs to be broken. She can also seek help from the police.

When the husband is sober, the wife can ask him, “Why are you doing this to me? Remember when we got married you promised to love and cherish me?” This may help him change. But if, say, he is only venting his frustration from work on his wife, then deal with the real issue. If he remains abusive, the wife must get legal help and/or professional counseling for both of them.

Ate Evelyn with the author

What about leaving the husband?
I would suggest that if she leaves, it should be only temporarily until the abuse problem is solved. In reality, it is hard for many wives to leave because of their children. That is why I tell the wives to acquire some expertise by which they can earn their own money. That way, if she is financially able, nobody can keep her at a home where she is being abused.

Let’s talk about the opposite extreme—the husband is nice but weak. How can a wife submit to someone she has difficulty respecting?
For the sake of the family, the wife has to do what she has to do. But, if the wife is a strong woman, she tends to take all the responsibility. That’s not helpful. What I suggest is that she delegates some tasks to her husband. She acts a little helpless. She can start with small things to build up his confidence. She can increase the tasks until he becomes more responsible.

Thank you for a wonderful interview. Any parting insight?
We keep hearing about problems plaguing the country. Take corruption, for example. If we read our history, we must recognize that corruption is not an intrinsic part of being Filipino. We, as a people, have a very strong sense of right and wrong. I like to think that God is in the process of shaping our country to be more centered on Him. As Christians, let us not lose hope because Christ is our hope. God is not yet finished with us, or the Philippines.

AUTHOR’S BIO: Nelson T. Dy is the author of Finding Comfort and How to Mend a Broken Heart. He is married to the wonderful Lucy Cheng.

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A neurologist says that if he can get to a stroke victim within 3 hours he can totally reverse the effects of a stroke...totally. He said the trick was getting a stroke recognized, diagnosed and getting to the patient within 3 hours which is tough.

Sometimes, symptoms of a stroke are difficult to identify. Unfortunately, the lack of awareness spells disaster. The stroke victim may suffer brain damage when people nearby fail to recognize the symptoms of a stroke.

Now doctors say a bystander can recognize a stroke by asking three simple questions:

After discovering that a group of non-medical volunteers could identify facial weakness, arm weakness and speech problems, researchers urged the general public to learn the three questions. They presented their conclusions at the American Stroke Association’s annual meeting last February. Widespread use of this test could result in prompt diagnosis and treatment of the stroke and prevent brain damage.

Also a new procedure for CPR has come across; saw it on FOX News the other day. For CPR give 2 breaths and then 30 chest compressions of the chest. Remember the patient needs to be on a hard surface.

www.heartcentersonline.com

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Rainy Day Rice Pudding

4 c milk 1/2 c white rice 1/2 c raisins 1/3 c butter 3 eggs 1 c sugar 1 t vanilla 1/4 t salt cinnamon On top of double boiler cook rice in two cups of milk until tender about 20-30 minutes. Add the raisins and butter. In another bowl combine eggs, sugar, vanilla, salt, and the rest of the milk. Mix and stir into the rice mixture. Sprinkle with cinnamon and bake in a 350 degree oven for 25-35 minutes, until slightly firm. Or, steam 60 minutes.

Blood pressure is the measurement of how hard the force of blood is pushing against the walls of the blood vessels. If your blood pressure is too high, it is a sign that your heart and blood vessels are being overworked.

High blood pressure, also called hypertension, is easy to diagnose and can be controlled. It is very important that people with high bloodpressure seek treatment, and carefully follow their doctor’s instructions.

Untreated high blood pressure can lead to many serious medical problems including congestive heart failure, heart attack, and stroke. Left untreated, high blood pressure will gradually rise over the years causing the heart to overwork itself to the point where serious damage can occur. Untreated high blood pressure places other organs, like kidneys at risk. The risk of developing serious health conditions increases as blood pressure rises.

In short…thank God for doctors and carefully follow their advice…even if that includes having the faith to believe God for the medicine you may need to take.

www.heart.healthcentersonline.com

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by Queen Potian with Evelyn Damian and Evie Francisco

Important considerations
Just as you would never jump into the ocean without knowing how to swim, it is important never to start a business without doing the necessary background research. Accurate infor- mation and the correct ‘follow through’ can help make your business successful.

1. If you are starting a business where you plan to manufacture something, find out:
   • Is there a market for my product?
   • What is a fair price for my product?
   • Can I afford to manufacture it at that price?
   • Who will distribute it?
   • What percentage will I have to pay them?
   • How long will it take for me to receive the money after my product is sold?
2. If you plan to sell someone else’s product, find out:
   • Is their product priced fairly and competitively?
   • What will my expenses be? (Transportation, food, etc.)
   • What will my commission be?
   • If I sell ‘hulugan’ how will I be sure I will actually get all the money?
3. If you are selling your services, find out:
   • Is there a demand for my services? (For example, if you want to start doing manicures, check and see if there is a need for a manicurist in your barangay. There may already be too many.)
   • What is a fair price to ask for my services?
   • How will people find out about me? Will I need to advertize?

What will you need to find out to begin your business?

1. Legal matters—will you need permits, licenses, etc.?
2. Capital—how much money will you need to start? Realize you will probably need more than you think you do. If you borrow money, remember to carefully calculate the interest you are incurring. High interest can cause business failure.
3. Materials needed or goods to sell—who are your sources?
4. How will you price your goods?
5. Location—where is the best location for your business?
6. Management set up—who will do your accounting?
7. Who will you need to hire?

Budgeting
You need a budget. If you do not pay careful attention to this, you will surely suffer financially. Whether you have a daily, weekly, or monthly budget depends on your circumstances, and the type of business you have. If you earn weekly, it is best to have a weekly budget.

Sources of capital
There are many kinds of organizations, NGOs, cooperatives that help people start businesses.

Do not write Moms for information regarding this. WE DON’T KNOW. Contact people in your locality or check with government agencies.

When you borrow money
You must be accountable and responsible. You must pay your debt. Remember to pay on time so you won’t incur any penalties. It is much better to start small and borrow small. Debt can stay with you for a lifetime.

Interest rates
There is a huge difference in interest rates. Some people work very hard and make almost no profit because they secured a loan at a high interest rate. If you borrow P5000 at 5% you will pay interest of P250. If you borrow P5000 at 5/6, you will pay P1,000 in interest alone! Don’t do it! It is better if you can start a business without any loan or liability even if you have to start smaller.

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by Peter Banzon

Pastor Peter Banzon

A:It’s tragic that in the search for answers, people are going to the wrong sources especially when it comes to wanting to know what the future has n store for them. It has become popular for people to consult astrologers who read the movement of the stars and the planets; they consult mediums that supposedly are able to talk with those who have long since died. They seek the readers of Tarot cards or crystal balls to read their fortunes. They consult Ouija boards or the so called “spirit of the glass”. The word of God, the Bible, warns us about the dangers of getting involved with these mystical, occult arts.

Listen to what God has to say, “When you arrive in the land the Lord your God is giving you, be very careful not to imitate the detestable customs of the nations living there. For example, never sacrifice your son or daughter as a burnt offering. And do not let your people practice fortune-telling or sorcery, or allow them to interpret omens, or engage in witchcraft, or cast spells, or function as mediums or psychics, or call forth the spirits of the dead. Anyone who does these things is an object of horror and disgust to the Lord” (Deut 18:9-12.)

God created us and therefore owns us. He has a right to set the rules for our lives. We are not to look to omens or “signs” to direct our lives. The Bible reprimands people for doing this. Look to God and His instructions for life found in the Bible. To do otherwise is to foolishly deceive yourself, or allow Satan and others to deceive you. Satan and his demons are real beings set on our destruction. Christians are warned to “put on the whole armor of God, that you may be able to stand against the schemes of the devil. Put on all of God’s armor so that you will be able to stand firm against all strategies and tricks of the Devil. For we are not fighting against people made of flesh and blood, but against the evil rulers and authorities of the unseen world, against those mighty powers of darkness who rule this world, and against wicked spirits in the heavenly realms. (Eph. 6:11-12)

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